30 November 2014

Dear people, if I keep telling you how sad and depress I am thinking about how you treat me and saying that "bitch em not giving a fuck" it's actually really stupid of me showing the dumbest part of myself. I kept watching how you react on what I've done or even when I'm doing my job now as a normal girl. I'm writing this down and in hope you'll be aware of what you've set on your damn mind. I'm not good at telling people and express what's really in my heart, I know it would be the third world war if I ever tell you that, it's better to keep everything inside even some people say 'tell the truth even it's bitter', it's probably not me. If you don't even like how I live my life then just go fuck yourself because it's my life and you're not the boss of me, you're not me, you're not even in my shoes. Yes I'm tired watching you people, stop care about me if you're about to hate everything I do because I won't stop. I've seen a lot of people, they're just stop talking to me because of a minor problem. I might say it's stupid but I did that too. I get hurt, well most of the time actually when I saw people treat me differently than others. I found it so weird because who the fuck I am to you, I'm your friends too, closed friends, but I got to open my eyes and see the world, it's moving not stay at one place. I know some of my friend never agree and couldn't accept my actions or my behavior. Maybe they're just don't like with who I am friends with, or maybe they're not really like when I'm close with their friends. How should I know, their smile hide everything. Just one question, is it wrong to friends with your friends? Tell you what people took my friends away from me and they didn't even give my friends back. If I'm the jerk, definitely i'll use them, ask them to bring me to the expensive store, use their money, ask them to buy me this, that and so on. People get me wrong so quick. I'm having a tough year, (every year) it's all because of friends. I stop befriend with others' friends since the war between me and my friends 4months ago. Getting tired, nobody sees the good, they're just can't stop seeking the bad of a person. I'm not blaming anybody, just think like adult, I know you can. Last but not least people, I choose to not care anymore. Goodnight